Friday, June 20, 2008

(Please send help.)

"Sure," I said when Friend asked if I wanted to take a trip with her to celebrate her birthday. We'd meet her former roommate after driving several hours, stay at a hotel, go to an amusement park, attend a cat show, do some shopping at an outlet mall and head home. What could go wrong?

"Did that say 'Live Babies in Incubators?'" I asked as we drove toward the hotel. "We should go home - the sign changed before I could read it all, but I really think we should turn around and go back. I'm very afraid."

"Oh, thank God," I breathed a few miles later. "It's not human babies - I think they're, um... What are those animals with the long mouths and lots of teeth? They swim. Sometimes they eat people."

"Alligators?" Friend said in a long-suffering voice and I nodded.

"I'm still afraid though. What's up with all the flashing lights? And Christmas decorations? It's June. And is it bad that every time we pass a building I think, 'Please don't be our hotel. Please, please, please don't be our hotel.'"

"I share that thought," Friend said but continued to move further inward to this touristy destination.

"There's a hot tub in the lobby," I whispered when we entered and she shushed me. I walked around, curious and still a little afraid, and moved back to her side as she was finishing with the carbon copy forms.

"Hi," I said to the front desk worker, a boy in college. "Does it ever freak you out to drive by all the lights and trashy shops?" He smiled and asked if I meant on the main street. I nodded, eyes wide with remembered trepidation.

"Why," he finally asked, "did you come here if you were only going to make fun of us?" He grinned while he asked it and I smiled in return while Friend told him he had a good point.

"We're with the cat show," she finally answered him.

"So you're with the cat show," he said returning his attention to me, "and you're making fun of us?" I giggled and said that I came because I was invited.

"I'm sure it's lovely," I noted and tried not to show my revulsion at the room.

"I've stayed in worse," Friend assured me.

But we're here. I slept reasonably well, despite Former Roommates 3:30AM arrival time (poor thing). Today we do amusement park. I hope to make it back here alive. But for now, picture me at a table right next to the giant hot tub. With lots of Southern people. Being slightly afraid. I'll return to the lobby tomorrow to let you know how I am. If you don't hear from me, figure out where I am and send help. Please.

4 comments:

Psych Post Doc said...

HA, he has your number.

Enjoy the park and the um.. hot tub in the lobby.. send pictures. ;)

Amanda said...

I humbly move to veto psych post doc's request. Unless one or more of the following stipulations can be met: (1) there is no one in said hot tub (I've been in that tier of hotel in The South and it's not pretty), (2) there is a warning to "look away quickly" if condition (1) is not met, and (3) please be sure to disinfect yourself if you do enter in said hot tub (no pictures necessary). Thank you.

Enjoy the amusement park. :-)

ScienceWoman said...

Oh dear. I think I know where you might be. If we don't hear from you - I'll send help.

Anonymous said...

Having been a live baby in an incubator myself for a few days at the very beginning of my life, I certainly agree no show should be made out of it.

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