- I awakened early this morning, a Chienne cuddled against the small of my back. I patted her, squinted at the clock and decided to get up even though it was barely 4:30.
- I did some work - thinking clearly and cleanly. Making presentations often helps clarify projects in my mind. Someone once told me that teachers had the best grasp of the material. Not that I would ever (ever, ever) want to teach, but it's a fair point.
- "Oh, look how cute," I murmured, bending to fetch the black-skirt-with-pink-pattern that had fallen behind my drying rack downstairs. I brushed the dust bunnies free of the hem, struggled into tights and tugged my newfound-treasure over my hips.
- When complimented on my outfit, I grinned and offered that I found the skirt behind my dryer! It's like new! Except a little dusty!
- I learned something from a colleague with whom I've had a tense relationship. She is a bit abrasive, but she's hospiced 3 family members to my 1 Daddy. So she's being kind to me. And I in return. It was one of my reservations about taking this job so it's nice that we're peaceful.
- I replanted more of Dad's memorial plants. I finally feel better about all (but 1) of them. The baskets in which they arrived were (1) not draining properly and I was waterlogging my new flora and (2) sad. I now have pretty pots shaped like giant tulip blossoms. They're silly. But doing an excellent job of guarding the corner of my desk.
- Oh, and I'm winning in my battle with the desk-stealing-nemesis. (In all fairness, I stole the desk. But he took it back! And NEVER sits there! So when he stopped by to introduce himself and ask about his stupid belongings, I sighed, walked 5 steps and pointed to the stuff obviously sitting just across the hall. I may or may not have muttered 'idiot' under my breath when moving back to my new cubicle home. He left shortly thereafter. I believe this means I'm winning.
- I went to lunch when invited today, sitting with my new team. Adam walked by and waved - I lifted my hand, a little wistful over the easy camaraderie I shared with my former colleagues. My new group manages a number of loosely-if-at-all-related projects so they don't have the 'all for one' mentality I used to enjoy. But they're lovely women. And I can perhaps contribute to building our sense of team.
- I avoided dinner with my former team. I had brunch with them yesterday and grow weary of saying good-bye to a team which disbanded some time ago. Yes, I loved working with them. Yes, I do miss them. But no, I am not good at keeping in touch. So let's just make a break and move on, yes?
- Instead, I finished some work (and felt proud for not procrastinating) and stopped at Qdoba. And it was free queso day! How lovely of Qdoba to give the gift of cheese dip! They appreciate me. You know who I appreciate? Qdoba. With their cilantro and guacamole and free queso. And friendly employees who are ever-so-efficient. And consistently high-quality burritos.
Now I'm exhausted. I'm still sad. And a little slow. And when I looked up at my calendar to check the fiscal week, I saw the photo of my dad and my heart broke a little more. Because I miss him. A lot.
But I'm really (really) trying (very hard) to find the positive. And - unless you don't count #7 - I didn't even have to use the way the setting sunlight filtered through the red maple leaves as I drove home!