Saturday, March 08, 2008

Things I learned from the news.

  1. When the sun shines on snow, it will be bright. You should wear sunglasses if you absolutely must leave your home.
  2. When standing in snow, your feet will get cold. The camera will focus on the poor reporter's feet to make sure we understand. Snow makes your feet cold if you absolutely must leave your home.
  3. If you children insist upon leaving your home to play in the snow, they should remember it is cold. They should wear hats, gloves and coats. And boots (see #2). And, for Heaven's sake, get them back inside as soon as possible.
  4. Driving is harder in the snow. There are many cars in the ditches, having crashed or been abandoned in the storm. It's really best if you don't leave your home.
  5. If you - for some unGodly reason - must leave your home, you should clean the snow and ice off the windows of your vehicle. You can do that with a scraper device or a credit card.
  6. There is enough snow to make a snowman. The reporters will do this while they wait for their next opportunity to impart more winter wisdom. Apparently practice is necessary to make good snowmen - these creatures on the news are the saddest piles of snow I've seen.
  7. (I learned this from watching out my front window.) If you lose traction when, I don't know, driving your giant truck around the corner, if you continue to accelerate, perhaps hoping that sheer force of will will propel you around the corner as you intended, I get to watch you spin all the way around. I enjoyed this - thanks.

Friend asked her boss for some measure of comparison for this amount of snow. "Is it like 3 feet of snow up north?" she asked.

"I don't leave my house in this," he replied. And, so, the rule applies. The news will help the lovely southern folks all it can, but it really is best if you stay safely inside your home. Which is why Friend decided to drive through the storm to get to my house. And why I'm currently contemplating a walk with the dog.

3 comments:

Seeking Solace said...

I am used to all of the snow-related stuff. One year, we got 7 feet in four day. Another year, we got 3 feet in 24 hours. You just deal.

I did go grocery shopping this morning. Snow and all.

Psycgirl said...

People where I live don't get snow either - if there is supposed to be an inch of snow, suddenly the grocery store is cleaned out of food and all schools are cancelled. I just don't get it. Snow isn't that challenging for the most part.

T said...

My flight home from Montreal got canceled on Saturday, due to a snow storm. My friend and I went shopping, all the malls in down town Montreal are connected and we weren't paying attention to the weather. We to the subway and a bus home, it dropped us off, and when I stepped off the bus onto the curb where the sidewalk should be, I was greeted by snow that came up to my knees. It was a fun trek to her house.

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